I love Italy. I want to live in Italy, whimsically run through Italian vineyards with a hot Italian guy (sorry to my partner. You’re hot too, of course), make my own Italian wine and eat Italian olives. But since I can’t do that due to a complete lack of financial planning and a pretty average face (Italians love the hotties), I sniffed out Bella Cosi instead, a new cafe in Port Melbourne opened only a few short weeks.

I ‘uumed’ and ‘arrred’ over which French toast I should get (there are two on the menu – savoury with ham, cheese and a heart attack, or sweet with berries, ice cream and a cavity). Of course I chose the cavity. I have plenty of teeth, only one heart. $11.50, which I thought was reasonable.

When it came out my initial thought was, ‘where’s the rest of it?’. One piece of toast smeared with some kind of chunky berry compote and a mini side bowl of ice cream. Not the Italian servings I’ve heard all about. But then I started eating.

The compote was sweet and tart at the same time. The berries were beautiful and the toast, although a bit soggy from the compote, was so good I smeared it over my face and the face of others around me.  I’m still unsure why they would serve ice cream in a breakfast dish. Maybe that’s the Italian way? I think it would have been better with a mascarpone or something. But of course I ate it. And licked the bowl.

The beauty of Bella Cosi is that it’s small enough to feel intimate, but big enough to feel like you have your own space. They’ve done a grouse job at bringing Italy to Melbourne without being so twee as to play Italian music or put biscotti on the side of every coffee. Almost all tables are next to windows, so you get this incredible ocean view. And everyone knows sitting next to a window with an ocean view makes you so much better than people who do not. However, if you don’t snare a window seat you can always sit in the ‘Naughty Corner’. I’m not joking – there’s a Naughty Corner. I’m thinking of putting the Laksa I made last night in there, although it would be better suited to a ‘that was totally shithouse’ corner.

I didn’t want to leave, and am currently planning an Oceans 11-style production so I can bury myself somewhere in the decor and live happily ever after.

You too could look cool just by sitting next to the window

Old people like to sit outside of cafes.

Bella Cosi on Urbanspoon

Robyn Box

About Robyn Box

I’m Robyn – a typical 30-something Melbournian. Most of my time is taken up being a Government office drone and an apathetic TV watcher, but occasionally I break out of the excitement of everyday life to dress my cat up in humiliating costumes, buy my niece and nephews expensive gifts in the hopes they pin me as ‘best Aunty’, wear amazing shoes that render me cripple within 60 minutes and eat foods that will no doubt bring on early cardiac arrest. Then occasionally I write about it. Find me on Twitter

1 Comment

  1. tom

    Reckon you should check out London in Port Melbourne’s breakfast (and coffee!)

    Really good staff too…